Deception.

I wrote this post about a week ago.  Since I was reviewing my drafts section, I saw this and remembered my devotion about that same day.  I feel sharing this to you guys for when I was momentarily feeling guilty about things in the past; God let me come across with this message.  This is a note to myself actually, quite personal; but a part of me is telling me to share this, most specially to those who are still trapped by the feeling of guilt.  :)

Have you ever done something foolish or stupid that it keeps resurfacing on your mind?

Well, I did… and they come in tons.

Some can be mistaken as funny and harmless, others really caused deep hurt to some people that I love.  Some are just easy to shrug off while some are serious enough that almost concluded friendships and relationships.

Lately, I’ve been haunted by these stories of the past.  I don’t know but for some reason these scenes keep replaying and even without contributing to its continuous occurrence, I find myself just being pinned to this feeling I try to fight the most, GUILT.

I can hear “voices” penetrating in my head now; “Look what you’ve done.  It’s never going back as same as before.” “You’re a horrible person and you claim yourself a child of God?” “You have a lot of apt in screwing things up aren’t you?”

Those voices are similar to Floyd Mayweather’s infamous sucker punch.  I believe it's somehow alike.  I didn’t see them coming and it was now on my face, punching and punching and trying to knock me out.

I remembered being too broken down, almost making away for doing something stupid and foolish again, when I suddenly remembered two verses that came into my defense which instantly shield those blows out of my way.

John 10:10 

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy;  But I have come so that you might have life, and have it to the full.

1 Peter 5:8

Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. 

God reminded me to whom these punches came from.  The enemy, like a roaring lion is on look-out for a prey to torment, to deceive, to kill.  This time, I wasn’t only hunted but haunted.  In my mind he keeps putting these mindsets, that I will never be loved and forgiven for what I did.  I will be forever condemned for the things that I did in the past.  This is what he's trying to do now, this is where the devil is good at.  Make me suffer.

Looking at these verses, I now see a good fight coming from here, and it was beautiful.  It’s beautiful because when I know that I’m about to be knocked out, I know that God already did took these punches for me.  He who took all the pain, guilt, sickness along when He died on the cross.  Bearing all my shame, sins, and all the things I’m not proud of, so that I can be clean and brand new.  That kind of resolve kept His promise that He came to give me a life and that I may have it abundantly.

Along with that, are promises and power which  made me fully comprehensible that He didn’t die for me to be miserable and slave of the guilt once again; to be insignificant and to be lost in this battle over and over.  For in this day to day battle, I am not on my own.

I remembered one pastor who actually said these words: “God is not in the business of taking things away.”  I loved the fact that when He said that “It is finished.” It means He has completed everything.  Not taking it back. I just have to fully acknowledge the thought that when He died for me, He didn’t just wash away my impurities but also soaked me with peace and power that can only be achieved, through Him alone.  I’m just in awe how I can triumph with this fight knowing I can trust and remain resolute in Him.

John 14:27

Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.

We may always be at battle with our minds.  Trust me, the devil would really wanted to get into that.  The devil is really good at deceiving.  Don’t let him make you feel worthless, horrible, confused, doubting; but know that by Jesus' incomparable love for us, we are redeemed.  It doesn't matter if we're the ones who hurt somebody or we're the ones who are wronged.  What matters is that in Christ, we are restored.  We are changed.  We are NEW.   


Hebrews 8:12
"For I will be merciful to their unrighteousness, and their sins and lawless deeds, I will remember no more."